In all our lives, with the passing of time and formative experiences, new versions of ourselves are born. They come calling or knocking at the door and sending midnight messages. What do we do? We try to ignore them. We generally run and hide. That's alright. Resisting change is natural. Before a rebirth there is always a death; all loss is accompanied by grief and is therefore painful, often overwhelming and even terrifying.
But to hold on and stay stagnant after a new version of yourself has been birthed is self-betrayal. You are necessarily denying the next stage of your evolution in order to continue belonging where you are now. If you think grief is painful, please know that if you refuse to answer the call or open the new door, you will continue to suffer until you finally either change or die.
You will be consumed by regret and resentment. You will no longer be able to find joy and beauty in life. You will be living out of fear. And that is no life at all.
So go ahead, take a chance and see what happens. Your next life starts now.
Sometimes you can get stuck in a relationship: You're in a constant state of trigger (fight/ flight/ freeze) instead of feeling intimately connected You've become two old stories instead of two open hearts You're scared or angry most of the time instead of feeling free and authentic It's heavy and complicated instead of light and playful There is more effort placed on control and strategy than growth and gratitude You are there because of a commitment, because you feel you “should”, not because you want to be. What can you do? You basically have 3 options: 1. Stay . Continue the slow, painful process of losing yourself in order to keep the relationship. 2. Let it go . Sacrifice your relationship to save your soul. 3. Change . You both have to be willing and capable of growing together. The goal here is to see if you can get back to love without sacrificing your authentic selves in the process. To do this, you must remove the idea of promises, attachment...
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