In the end

I want to be the warm, safe haven where you lay your head
That's the thanks for breathing life into my soul, when I thought it all but dead
I want to celebrate the depths we swam together
The empowerment and joy it gave us both
I want to always remember the fierce spark
That lives within us and lights the way.

Maybe it was just a moment
Maybe it's with us forever
It keeps replaying back to me the deepest longings of my soul
And I know, unequivocally, I will no longer endure, simply for the sake of enduring.
But I will give it my all.
I will show up in my rawest form, at my most vulnerable, tentative and free.
That's what this did to me.

Once in a lifetime there's a feeling like you've never known before
You can choose to let it in or simply shut that door
I am not so brave to say I'm unaffected by something so unexpected
I'm not so wise to have no fear of the struggle between safety and intimacy.

But I am awake now. I am in the here and now, and although
I sometimes cannot make a sound
I feel everything, and it's freeing.
It hurts and it pleases and it finds all the reasons.