This is what regret looks like...
We all worry we won't make the 'right' choice when faced with hard decisions. What's right for us may not be right for others, but we are always looking for objectively 'right reasons' to justify our choice. The inconvenient truth is, we define our own reasons based on who we want to be and what type of life is meaningful and fulfilling to us. The alternative is we drift through life, avoiding hard decisions and letting external factors or people choose for us. We do what we feel we 'should' do and feel a bit empty, or maybe resentful, or just plain disappointed with where we are. We long for the ice cream but can't or won't give up the popsicle; out of fear, insecurity or pragmatism, we deny ourselves the things we want thinking we might grow to appreciate the things we have that clearly don't work for us.
Sometimes you can get stuck in a relationship: You're in a constant state of trigger (fight/ flight/ freeze) instead of feeling intimately connected You've become two old stories instead of two open hearts You're scared or angry most of the time instead of feeling free and authentic It's heavy and complicated instead of light and playful There is more effort placed on control and strategy than growth and gratitude You are there because of a commitment, because you feel you “should”, not because you want to be. What can you do? You basically have 3 options: 1. Stay . Continue the slow, painful process of losing yourself in order to keep the relationship. 2. Let it go . Sacrifice your relationship to save your soul. 3. Change . You both have to be willing and capable of growing together. The goal here is to see if you can get back to love without sacrificing your authentic selves in the process. To do this, you must remove the idea of promises, attachment...
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